at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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