Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
You took a bar mat shot.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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