When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
