dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize