College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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