But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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