I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
