so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
