dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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