remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize