Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
