Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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