Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
