Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
