i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Terrible idea I love it
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize