I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
