he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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