One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
