She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
