fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Moan for me like Helen Keller
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Randomize