Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
