scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
