So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Someone shattered a urinal.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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