I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
