don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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