Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Randomize
