like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
