i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
MIDGETS
????
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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