I showed him my bush... on skype.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
The feeling are messing with the penis
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
