I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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