is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
