You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
