Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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