I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Too much gin, very little bucket
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
