just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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