this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
