3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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