why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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