Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
