I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Randomize