All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
