Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
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