she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
