Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
it hurts more in the daytime
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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