Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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