Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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