My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
meet me or not, i'm out of control
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
So here I am, sexting at work.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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