So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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