some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Randomize
