you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
